Life Lately

The last 18 months have been some of the hardest and most rewarding.  But I also think those two attributes go hand in hand.  Nothing is worth something unless you have to work for it.  There have been numerous times in my life when my parents were trying to implant that in my head.  Well...point accomplished.


Life is tough and when problems rise you have two options:  run or face it head on.  I've tried both, whether it has been in relationships, work problems, or finances.  Sometimes it just seems easier to turn the other way and pretend that the problems are not there.  In fact, I think that is what most people do.  We live in an alternate reality, where we get to pick was is real and what is not.  Over the last 18 months, Stephanie and I have decided to take the bull by the horns.

I believe our situation started out of necessity but morphed into a life changing mindset.  About 18 months ago we were at our wits end financially.  No, I wasn't out of work and we were not losing our house, we had plenty to eat.  The problem was that we were so focused on our needs that we didn't see the pit we were drowning in.  I had risen at great speed in my career and along with that came great financial perks.  I soaked it in, felt accomplished, felt like what I did was doing something great for my family.  And I couldn't have been more wrong.  Although I was at the highest pay scale I had accomplished, I was teaching my family a detrimental lesson.  We were sinking in debt.  No we were never flashy with our money (at least we didn't try to be).  We didn't need to have the latest electronics or fashions that most people crave.  This is how I justified our financial standings.  By looking at what the rest of the world was doing, and not looking at what the Bible teaches.


We were lucky enough to take a trip up to Montana one summer and my parents introduced a few financial books to us and some Cd's.  On the drive back down south to California I was extremely reluctant (internally) to listen to those Cd's.  What that meant for me was to look at the defeat and weakness in my life.  Although we hadn't really spent much on credit for the last couple years, we didn't do anything about our debt situation either.  The Cd's were from a pastor, Gary Keesee, and what he was preaching on was simply what the Bible had to say about finances.  It was pretty eye opening and tough to listen to.  I brought up images of all the things I thought were important, and the false security I put in money.


The problem was my mindset.  I thought it was noble to care so much about my career and climbing the corporate ladder.  Looking back it is easy to see that all the hard work I did was for recognition of myself.  I do not like to flaunt money, and over the last few years God has given me a heart for the broken.  But my career came first, money came first, the security it brings came first.  The way God shows us to live financially could take a back seat.


That was until, of course, I was changed by the message of these pastors.  They showed how we were actually drowning although we had a great monetary year.  It made me feel suffocated.  It made me question what kind of leader I was to my family.  It showed me the sinful life I had been living.  Man...was that hard to look at.  In a friend's blog he references a phrase, "Inspiration without action is escapism."  Here was my choice...face it..or escape.  I feared I had already gone so far down the road.  It made me sick to think of continuing down.  After about 15 hours of God's guidance through these Cd's, we were home, and I knew what we had to do.  It was time to stop living a lie and start living the fulfilling life God had for us.  Over the next 18 months, what I thought was going to be torturous, was actually a huge weight lifted off our shoulders.  We did everything we could from selling things to making big sacrifices.  And even through losing my job, we never lost track of what we were going to accomplish.  God wants us to live debt free, as the world screams at us to consume no matter the cost.


We have now paid off half our debt within this time.  What we thought would take over 5 years has now only taken 18 months.  We are on track financially and mentally.  So many times I see older people around my parents age, and they are drowing even more than we were.  I am so greatful for what God has revealed to us at such an early age in life.  I would challenge whoever reads this to have courage and look at your situation and make a choice...face it or escape it.  I can only share with you the burden that has lifted off our entire family.  Sure things are still tight until we become completely debt free, but the victories along the way are so sweet.  This is the way God wants us to live so that we can take the focus off our situation and help those in need.  That is where I find the greatest joy in life, raising my family and helping other people with their misfortunes.


Thank you for reading,
Peter Dixon