The Power of Music

Some of the most influential things in my life mostly are people.  My parents, my wife, kids, pastor, great friends.  These people have been a huge asset that I cannot quantify.  But what happens when these people are not around and I am alone?  In my life, this is where music has stepped in and has been inspirational, thought provoking, emotional and has influenced my life.  I will take you on my journey of the different times in my life where music has affected me the most.


As a child I remember listening to music young.  Back in those days you were influenced by what other kids were listening to: New Kids on the Block, Criss Cross, MC Hammer, and the classic Vanilla Ice.  Looking back I can proudly say I am embarrassed that I ever let those sound waves come close to my ears.  Back then, this was just filler music, didn't really mean much or have much impact on who I was.



When music really became a significant role in my life was when my parents got divorced.  The divorce seemed as messy as it could get with me trapped in the middle.  Often I was left alone as a ten year old, having no option but to raise myself, comfort myself and find ways to emotionally survive the turmoil I was experiencing on a daily basis.  At that time I was greatly influenced by what my parents listened to.  As the loneliness crept in after school and during the evening I found comfort in the worship songs of Dennis Agajanian and also the lyrics of Peter Cetera.  Talk about parent music, I know.  Many nights as I lay in bed not being able to fall asleep I would put these tapes in and weep.  There were many reasons for this sobbing, sadness, loneliness, confusion, hurt but eventually these songs brought comfort and temporary healing.  I believe during this time in my life that music was what I would lean on most for emotional support and for answers.  This is what set the foundation for the rest of my life with my love of music.


As years passed and I started realizing my independence, that spilled over into starting to choose what music would influence me.  I started feeling like my parents music really did not define who I was completely and could not relate to the situations I was in as a preteen.  I remember one night my family went to visit family friends.  In the family there were older boys that were in their mid to late teens.  That night changed my life in a couple ways.  This was the first night I was introduced to skateboarding and punk rock music.  "Now THIS is something I could relate to," I remember thinking.  The music was edgy and skateboarding was extreme.  I was tired of living like a victim in the wake of my parent's divorce and now sought to find strength and independence in music.


That night started my love of the band MxPx.  At the time the band was only a couple years old, fresh out of high school.  There lyrics were surfacy but the use of their instruments was epic.  I started to let the lyrics influence me and define part of who I was.  I would be playing this music anytime I could.  Once I was out of school I would have my Walkman on constantly, blaring MxPx the rest of the day.  As years went on I was exposed to other punk bands that shared in this independent revolution.  During my high school years, I was again left lonely as my relationship with my mom was very strained.  My dad had moved out of state because of work and I was left with a mom who was very self focused and angry.  Mostly she was angry with my dad which then she would reflect on me.  So once again, no emotional, mental or spiritual support at home.  Music was my parent, it looked out for me, guided me.  Never was it condescending of me or critical of me.  It was uplifting and made my life focused on succeeding despite my past.


As high school winded down I connected with friends that were in bands, hardcore bands.  Soon after I graduated I moved out and moved in with a friend's family.  I couldn't take living with my mom anymore, I was tired of the abuse.  I was 17 at the time, so my mom called the cops on me, trying to force me to come back home.  I let the cops know that it was not a good living situation for me and that I felt much safer for a family who would support me.  Not only did I find support with this family but also in the family I made in the hardcore scene.  As I started attending shows I came to realize that I was seeing the same people at every show.  It was a close knit community that became my second family.  The music was the heaviest I experienced and yet still healing.


Today, music still plays a huge part in my life.  I still love going to shows, although now sometimes I feel I could be these kids parent.  When I have a rough stressful day music usually enables me to slow down and find peace.  Whether it's worship, punk, hardcore or 70's rock n' roll, music has a huge power to heal and influence your life.  When was a time in your life that music has made a huge impact?  What were you listening to?  What songs bleed out of you because you have listened and depended on those words for so long?